My mom will be 73 this month. Yep, that’s a looong time to be around.

My mom is wise in many things like ancient history… I’m sure she could probably recite the entire family tree of such Biblical figures as Noah, Job, or even Nebuchadnezzar if need be. She can probably tell you all of this year’s Showstopper specials from the Shopping Channel according to date, price and category if you’d like. And frankly, I am also certain that she could appear on the Dr. Oz show as an expert on health matters… well, either that or she could work in a Chinese health store selling bamboo bark tea, tiger penis balm, or eye of newt lozenges.

That being said, knowledgeable in recent lingo or society she is not. Last year I took her to see Eat Love Pray. This was actually the first (and possibly ONLY) movie I’d seen at the theatre with my mom in my whole life. (I had loving older sisters who’d taken me to all the movies my heart desired as a kid – therefore, no mom needed)

As Julia Roberts made her way through her journey of the movie, my mom bypassed the whole plot and was repulsed by the fact that Julia was more or less sleeping her way around the world. She couldn’t get over the fact that she was sleeping with men she hardly knew.  Nevermind that the character found her existence in life … no, she was a tramp in my mom’s eyes.

This brings me to my newest mom-ism.  Mom caught a glimpse of a repeat trailer of a 2009 movie and she called me immediately to tell me that she was appalled at the “garbage” on TV these days. Not knowing what she was talking about, the conversation went something like this:

Mom: Well! I’m just disgusted by the sheer filth they put on TV now.

Me: Oh yah? What’s on? (I could hear her huffing in disgust, and I was assuming she was somehow illegally getting the Hustler or Playboy station.)

Mom: Oh, I don’t know what it was… just something disgusting with that Jennifer Anniston.

Me: (totally baffled as to what Jen could have been in that is so horrible) Jennifer Anniston? What show is on?

Mom: Oh it’s not on right now, it was just a preview of that movie “He’s just not that into you.” Some one of these channels is going to be showing it this week.

Me: (not seeing at all how this could be a vulgar thing) And what’s so bad about that?

Mom: repeating the title again like I didn’t hear her the first time, “HE’S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU”.

Me: Riiiiight.  I heard you the first time Mom.

Mom: (getting all flustered again). Well, it must be a pornography if they are talking about a man not being in you. It’s just disgusting filth. It’s no use even turning the TV on if this is all the garbage and trash that is gonna be on it.

She went on and on for a solid five minutes of how the TV is nothing more than a slideshow of a modern day Sodom and Gomorrah. Now at this point, I could have told her it had nothing to do with that, but why bother. hahahah… if anything, it’s good for a laugh and even better, for a blog post!

Gosh, I love my mom.  LOL.